Which club makes you risk your job, health and driving licence to watch them…? | OneFootball

Back in 2003, I found myself back at school.

This is due to the fact that my original school qualifications had added up to precisely nowt, but at the age of 40 with a young child to support, it was time to listen and learn.

I was very grateful to my company for paying for this qualification, however, there was one big problem.

The problem being, the classes I had to attend went on until 9pm, on nights that clashed with our Champions League fixtures at St James’ Park.

The company knew I was a season ticket holder and my boss had made it clear. Forget the football, we have invested good money into you. Do not let us down.

There are three home games – Feyenoord, Juventus and Kiev. How many sickies can I throw? Common sense says I can get away with one .

I choose the first game against Feyenoord to get a serious stomach problem. Off to the match I go, to see us get turned over by our Dutch visitors.

My boss understandably does not believe for a moment that I was sick and tells me straight. I had better be at college when we play Juventus, or my potential promotion will be “reviewed”…

What’s a lad to do ?

I come up with cunning plan.

I do my half day at work then head off to South Tyneside college where I sign in for the day.

I stay in the class until the 6pm break, when would you believe it. I receive a call informing me that my mother has taken a fall. She is ok but I’m going to have to leave college and go to hospital to be with her.

My tutor waves me off, giving my mum his best wishes.

So I’m off to the match. How easy was that?

I’m in the Leazes end and get a great view of Andy Griffin scoring the winner. It’s a wonderful night and I head home very happy.

Next day the boss calls me to his office. “How were yesterday’s lessons?”

“They were ok, we were doing the difference between corporate and civil law and…”

“Just stop. You weren’t there. I know you weren’t there. I saw you on the telly!”

Oh dear.

“No way Dave, what can I say, it wasn’t me.”

“So you weren’t sitting in the Leazes end” ?

“I was in college Dave, honest. Are you sure you didn’t see my brother, he has his season ticket there.” .

Dave is not having it. I’m in trouble.

In desperation I say, “Look, why don’t you ring the college reception, they can confirm I signed in.”

My boss decides to do just that and I realise that my career could be on the line.

Reception tells him that I had signed in but I had forgotten to sign out.

So I survive…just.

However, that was that. I wasn’t going anywhere near the Kiev game.

Issue 160 – 11 September 2002

By the time we get to the last group match, which is the famous return with Feyenoord in Rotterdam, Newcastle United have a very outside chance of qualification.

I’m sitting in the classroom utterly hacked off, when the tutor takes pity and decides to finish the class a little early. I get to my car to find out Newcastle United are two up.

So this results in me hurtling down the A194 at 90mph, hoping the traffic cops are too busy listening to the match to notice.

By the time I get back to my house it’s 2-2 with only minutes remaining.

I come charging through the door, screaming at wifey to put the match on, trip over a kids toy, crack my head on the table and knock myself senseless.

By the time I regain my senses, it’s just in time to see Bellamy get the injury time winner.

Issue 168 – 22 March 2003

It’s all been worth it.

What club makes you risk your job to watch them?